"According to the Philadelphia Inquirer, a secret panel meets every week in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, to go through applications for state vanity license plates to reject any that are considered sleazy or offensive. They wouldn't want anyone with a crude saying on their license plate driving through the town of Intercourse, Pennsylvania."
--Jay Leno

One of the most charming things about Southern Pennsylvania - especially the Lancaster County area - is all the unusual names of the townships. (Pennsylvanians are also fond of putting a structure on a hill and calling it "something Knob." Even FLW did it. The KingofHearts and I have a plan to purchase a hilly property in Pennsylvania some day and name it "Rhee Knob." I'll let you ponder on that one a bit.)

For example:



Or:


And possibly my favorite:


You can all get your mind out of the gutter (because everyone knows I can't) while I inform you that the name of the township comes from the historic Blue Ball Inn which stood in the city for more than two hundred years. Unfortunately, it was torn down in the 1990s. Ah. Progress.

Anyway, our sense of humor being what it is, I handed the camera to The KingofHearts while driving through Blue Ball, so he could take a photograph of this:


Because who doesn't need a picture of that, may I ask? No one! That's who!

As I was slowing the car and pulling over to the curb, I heard The KoH suck air through his teeth and yell, "Oh!... Wait... look out for the... don't hit the... Aaaaaah!"

Side note to young women currently considering a proposal from their beloved: The ability to finish a sentence in one pass is a character asset you might not consider mandatory now, but will gain increasing importance as years go by. Especially when that trait (or the lack thereof) is passed down to your children and you spend approximately one-quarter of your waking hours silently thinking, "WHAT?!?!" while WAITING FOR THE FREAKING POINT.

As I was frantically looking around for the small child that I assumed had run into the street and was now about to become a permanent part of my paint job, a loud "clang" finished his sentence for him and informed me that my right front tire had hit a large piece of steel that was covering a gap in the sidewalk and sticking about six inches into the road.

Yeah... that's what he was trying to warn me about.

Then we had a chance to get a real close up picture of the sign, because we all had to get out of the car and change the tire with the big gash in the sidewall.

The Caterpillar wanted to help, and I offered to do it, but I'm much slower at these things than he is and she is slower still (we're working on that - by three I expect her to be able to rotate my tires in under six minutes). So we deemed it better to take everyone for a walk instead. Because Getting Out of Blue Ball now seemed to have risen to the top of my priority list. (And there's a sentence I never imagined I'd write and publish in an open forum.)


So we left The KoH to change the tire all by himself.


As we walked away from this scene, The Dormouse exclaimed, "Finally, Daddy can have SOME PEACE!"

So let that be a lesson to you young men with that engagement ring burning a hole in your pocket right now. If you do not want your definition of "peace" to one day mean "changing a tire on the side of the a state highway," run, do not walk, to the jewelry store and get your money back. But if you're lucky, you'll find some young blushing bride who is willing to take the kids on a walk and will find this:

and will share your sense of humor and think it's funny enough to let you pose like this:

in front of it.

Moral of the story: Do not laugh a Blue Ball, Pennsylvania because Karma is a harsh mistress.