Would you rather....

Stick your tongue on something cold and metal or pee on an electric fence?
Tongue on cold metal. I've stuck my tongue to enough ice cubes to know how to get out of that one, but peeing on an electric fence? Thankfully, I have no experience with that.

Do the dishes or clean the bedroom?
I generally leave both undone - it's what makes me consistent.

Do your homework or kiss your teacher?
Depends on the teacher.

Have a fever or have the chills?
I generally don't get one without the other.

Take a needle or have a tooth pulled?
Needle - takes less time.

Lose a finger or lose a toe?
Lose a toe - you can't play most instruments with a missing finger. Toes are generally optional.

Be caught stealing or caught cheating?
I guess it depends on the magnitude of the stolen or cheated thing. I'd rather be caught stealing a pack of gum than cheating on my taxes, for example.

Be in an accident or cause an accident?
Be in an accident. That way I get to feel righteous indignation toward the other guy. Causing one leaves you with no one but yourself to blame.

Run down the street naked or in lingere?
Really, no one wants to see either. I consider it a service to the human race that I have never chosen to become a nudist.

Have no eyes or have no ears?
What was that Helen Keller said? "Blindness cuts you off from things. Deafness cuts you off from people."

Go a month without internet or without tv?

Get a wedgie or a wet willie?
Aren't both equally creepy?

Have bad breath or bad B-O?
With bad breath, you can at least keep your mouth closed.

Get a bad haircut or go bald?
I've had lots of bad haircuts. But I've threatened to shave my head lots of times and never gone through with it.

Spend a day with Richard Simmons or Peewee Herman?
Peewee Herman. Here's something I've never admitted to anyone: When I was in college, I watched Pee Wee's Playhouse every Saturday morning and found him and the show fascinating. Did you know that Laurence Fishburne, S. Epatha Merkerson, and Phil Hartman were all cast members on that show? (Maybe it would be better if I didn't know that.) Of course, I'd definitely have to choose where and when to spend that day with Paul Reubens. Hanging out with him in a dark movie theater would probably not be the best choice of activities to share.