Early summer is the time for all these local community fairs in our area. In the last couple of months, we've been to Honfest, the BARC field day, University of Maryland day, Frying Pan Park, Children's Mental Health Awareness day, and at least six main street festivals in Virginia, Maryland, and D.C. This weekend we're headed out to a dance-a-thon which, sadly, I have been roped into helping to run. There is always a plethora of things to do, most of which can be done for free. That is, if you can avoid, "Mom, mom. Please? Please mom, can you buy me that? PLEASE??!? I NEED a pink and purple plastic trumpet that buzzes like a sick goat and annoys everyone who comes within thirty feet of me so that I can practice for when I will one day attend soccer tournaments and create controversy wherein I drown out the announcers with a vuvuzela." (Because "eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhh!" is so much worse than "goooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal!")

The street festivals aren't just limited to the summers, though. We've also been to a Fall Foliage Celebration, Apple Blossom Festival, Strawberry Days, and PumpkinFest (which are all conveniently scheduled around harvest time). In the Spring, there's the Cherry Blossom Parade, Rolling Easter Eggs on the White House lawn (which I have yet to get tickets to, damn you government lottery ticket fair dispersal people; it would be easier to stand in line for tickets and sleep on the sidewalk), and let's not forget that every ethnicity from every corner of the world has a celebration of nationalist pride somewhere in or between one of the two cities.

We've looked at classic cars,

milked a cow (note to self: teach kids that while this method will get results, it won't be milk),

gotten our faces painted and climbed on a tractor,

eaten a chocolate covered cricket while carrying around balloon animals,

admired a three foot tall beehive with a roach stuck in for accent:

stared at a bathtub buried in the ground and used as a farm animal drinking trough,

(you thought I was kidding about that one right, right?)

It's almost like they're helping me schedule my Camp Sweatshop events. Oh, how I love this city.