I took these pictures illegally with my camera phone at the Jon Stewart show Cootie's mom and I attended this weekend. (She was brave enough to attempt to smuggle her camera in, so go to her site for better photos.)

She managed to buy us two tickets, decide that they simply were not close enough to Mr. Salty Goodness to be deemed acceptable, sell them on eBay, and buy two more single seats that w
ere in row F. (Best friend EVER!) We were close enough to him that if he expectorated in our direction really, really hard from the stage, it's just possible that we could have been in Jon Stewart spittle heaven. Under what circumstances would he actually do that? I have no idea; I just can't help but wish it would happen.

Overall, he was hilarious, and even the warm up guy was funny, if weirdly obsessed with bears. It was certainly worth changing to an earlier flight back from Kansas City and messing up the meeting we had scheduled so I wouldn't miss the opening act and possibly the first few minutes - then artfully dodging the real reason we had to leave early ("I... Um... have an appointment in Baltimore tonight and have to catch an earlier flight so we'll ending t
his meeting early. But since we promised to buy you lunch, please enjoy this pizza at 10:30 in the morning. OK Bye!").

One thing I realized, however, was that if you have obsessively recorded and watched The Daily Show every day for the past 3 years, you've probably seen three quarters of Jon's jokes already, just in an unconcentrated format. It was totally worth it to hear them again, though. I also spent an inordinate amount of time wondering why both performers felt it necessary to come onstage with their giant wallet in their pockets. (Did I mention row F?!? I could totally see what he had in his pockets! And yes... I'm sure it was a wallet.) Is there no safe place to leave it in the green room? Limo? Does Jon Stewart really need his wallet when he's on tour anyway? I mean, he probably has someone dr
ive for him, get his coffee, bring him dinner. I would like to apply for that job, by the way. I'd always hoped and imagined that one of the perks to being famous someday was that I wouldn't have to carry a purse. I guess given that that's no longer true, I won't go ahead and become a world famous celebrity after all.

Unfortunately, the camera phone does not have a flash, so all the pictures I took of him ended up just looking like he's been touched by God and transformed into some kind of glowing saint.

Coincidence? I think not.