Everything is closed today. The federal government? Closed. Local governments? Closed. Schools? Closed? My office? Closed.  They're all dead, Dave. All because of this:


Clearly.  Because we're Washingtonians.  We can't be expected to brave the cold, cruel winter and go out in THIS, are you crazy, man?!?

Actually, there are high winds expected later today, so I'll reserve my judgement about The Snowstorm That Wasn't until I get through the night with my electricity intact.

In the meantime, the schools are closed, but it's really just wet outside and there's no good snow to build a snowman or go sledding, so we're all just lying around on the floor in our pajamas, watching television.  So... just like any Saturday morning, pretty much.

About two hours in, I remembered that, oh yeah, school might be closed, but their stomachs are still open. Too bad you can't get a day off from feeding them breakfast.  

The house is chilly,  It's cold and wet outside.  Seems like a good morning for baking. 

Only one problem with that: I don't really like to bake.  

So I whipped out an old standby from my college years, early marriage, middle-thirties and taught the kids to make it.  It's so easy, a child could make it (which is good, because that's what I made my child do for her breakfast).

Here's what you need:



There are so few ingredients, I don't think a "cast of characters" photo is really warranted here, but I'm trying to be all Professional Blogger-y and stuff. 

Get some honey (any kind), nuts (your preference), and a tube of refrigerator biscuits (cheap). 

Chop up the nuts and sprinkle them in the bottom of a pie dish.  I like this weird casserole dish even better because it's a little smaller than a pie dish and keeps the biscuits slightly closer together as they cook.  Also because it's glass and the ability to see underneath is cool to me for some unknown reason.



Drizzle honey over the nuts.



How much? Half a cup? A cup? Idunno. Enough. Seriously, don't ask me that question because I have never measured anything for this recipe. I also do not know how many nuts to use. Usually the question becomes how many nuts do I have rather than how many nuts should I use and the answer is use all of them.  I basically watched a chef-type friend make this once in the middle 90s and just tried to mimic him in the kitchen by talking intelligently about food and gesticulating wildly.  He has an actual recipe and stuff, which is why I'm pretty sure his always come out better than mine, but I've never asked him for it because I am lazy and forgetful.  What I can tell you is this: use more honey than you think you need. But if you end up with biscuits that seem a little dry after baking, you can always pour more sugar on me pour more honey on biscuits if you want, so no harm, no foul.  

Pop open the canister of biscuits and arrange the dough slices.



I like them to almost be touching, but not too close.  This is because I usually buy those off-brands of biscuits and they don't puff up very much in the oven.  If you're using one of those fancy biscuits-in-a-can varieties that expand to three times their original size, you might want to use the actual pie dish and leave a little more space in between them.

Place in oven and follow the baking directions on the package.



Or don't. I have usually thrown the package out by the time I get to this step and cannot find the baking directions. So I guess wildly. This, I believe, was at around 450 degrees for ten minutes.



Just look for that old baking standby, "until golden brown" which is only slightly more helpful than "bake until done."

When they are done, and this is the part I wouldn't let the kids participate in, you have to flip the whole thing. And you have to do it while it's still hot so all the honey doesn't stick to the baking dish. So find yourself a serving dish and a couple of good oven mitts, place the dish over the top, hold the two tightly together, 



and flip.



The whole thing falls out like a pineapple upside down cake.

Just remember that there's bunch of hot, viscus honey in there, so you have to do it quickly and make sure you have a good grip on both dishes because if you don't, that hot, viscus honey will flow out and onto your arms and getting some scalding, sticky honey on your skin, especially when you are holding an even hotter dish that just came out of the oven with oven mitts and you can't just drop it on the floor because you haven't bothered to put shoes on yet and it'd probably land on your feet, is about as comfortable as wearing a napalm* body suit.**

Serve it pretty on a plate.



Or pull the pieces apart...



...because the monkeys will devour it immediately while staring longingly out the window and wishing for more snow.***




*this post brought to you by napalm
**and run-on sentences
***see that one on the left? She has her pajamas on inside out