What follows is a transcript of my OB visit yesterday:

Nurse takes blood pressure: "Hmmm... It's a little on the high side."

"How high?"


"Well, that's not normal."

Enter Dr. RandyQuaid - figures it's him.

"You seem to be causing some problems here today."

"Yeah, I guess the blood pressure was a little high. But keep in mind, I just came here from work and hiked my pregnant self up the stairs because the elevator door wouldn't open, so I'll bet if you take it again, it'll go down."

"Have you been experiencing any unusual stress lately?"

"Hmm... well, this weekend my brother's friends were killed in a helicopter crash, last month a relative committed suicide but now it looks like maybe her ex-husband was involved, they're trying to figure out custody for her kids, we almost moved to Oregon a few weeks ago, then my husband turned down that job and got a different one entirely, but we still might move to be closer to his new work if he keeps that job, we bought a car, I'm trying to finish a bunch of projects at work before maternity leave, I have a three year old at home and oh yeah, I'm pregnant.... do you want the rest of the list, or is that good enough?"

"Oh." silence "Well, have you been experiencing any swelling?"

"Have you taken a look at me?"

"Any vision problems?"

"Nope. You got me with that one."

"OK - well, relax for a few minutes and we'll take it once more before you leave. If it doesn't go down, we need to talk about what to do next. In the meantime, here's a prescription for a
RhoGam shot. You need to go to the hospital and have them administer this as soon as possible because it's time."

"You can't do that here? I got the last one at the perinatologist's office."

"No - we can't do that in the office anymore... so you have to go to the lab at the hospital. They won't take appointments, so you just need to go early in the morning and hope they can see you without waiting a very long time."

"You don't really want my blood pressure to go down, do you?"

He almost sent me home with a bed rest order, but when the nurse took it again it was down to 140/80, which I guess at least shows improvement, and he let me go back to work with the stipulation that now, instead of office visits every two weeks, I'm required to come in once a week. If the blood pressure is still high next week, I'll probably be ordered to bed. Yeah... that oughtta help with the blood pressure.

So until then, could you try not to stress me out? Kthanksbye.