The saga of the bath crayons continues, but I never really told you the beginning. 

Basically about two weeks ago, I was in Target and without the ability to self-regulate, I saw a package of bath crayons on sale and grabbed them off the end wrap as we were walking by.   I used to purchase these years ago when the Shortlings were... well... shorter, but at nine and five, the girls are almost too old for these things.  However, I'm pretty sure there's a seventy-five dollar purchase minimum every time I simply walk into Target (or maybe the good folks at Target just want me to think that) so, this helped fill a quota.  When I got home, I stuck them on a shelf in the bathtub and said nothing.

The Shortlings used them, of course, not because what they'd been missing in their lives was bath crayons or because bath crayons make you smarter, but because they were there. They drew on the walls and left strange pictures of Easter eggs and zombies and made a giant mess. And then I started cleaning it all off when I was in the shower and leaving a picture of my own in it's place.  And then they took it a step further with a host of not-necessarily-appropriate-for-children movie quotes.  And I took it a step further than that with a series of crossword puzzles which they, in turn filled in when they were in the shower. And that's when our water bill increased by twenty percent because we were all just standing around naked in the shower, thinking of new things to write on the bathroom walls.

And then there was a day where I didn't take a shower that morning, so The Dormouse left me a word search instead.  It was cute.  I took my turn in the shower and completed her word search.  The next day when it was still there, I was in the bathroom and happened to notice a slight theme about the words she incorporated:


  • Mom
  • Dad
  • Family
  • Love
  • LA
  • Movie
  • Bye

OK, maybe I'm reading too much into it.  Not every single one of the words was a message of love and gratitude, but I like to think it's okay to instill a love of movies and Los Angeles in my children as well. Either way, it is not lost on me that when she created a game for me to do while I was standing naked in the shower, the first words that occurred to her to write down were Mom, Dad, Family and Love.  

I do alotta stupid things for... and sometimes just around... my kids.   Cuphands, anyone?

I just hope that some of the stupid stuff I do covers up for my mostly total ineptitude as a parent and ends up being things they look back on when they grow up and smile about.  I know when I grow up I will.