The KindofHearts came home the other day and claimed he was threatened by a crawdad at work. I don't know why this tickles me so. He was getting out of the truck in the parking lot and saw something moving on the ground. When he looked down, he saw a very misdirected crawdad with one missing claw. The other claw was waving up at him in a menacing crawfish stance as if to warn him he'd darn well better stay away or he'd get his toenails clipped. Or at least that's what KingofHearts assumed it meant.

But how much do we really know about the language of crawdads? Perhaps it was extending a hand of welcome. "Hey buddy, I see you're new around here, want to go check out the pond scum?"

Maybe it was looking for a handout. Or perhaps it had a terrible nicotine addiction and was simply looking for a light. I can even imagine it pointing to KingofHearts's watch to remind him to get inside before he was late. Oh, the possibilities.

Whatever it meant, KingofHearts didn't stop to try and talk to it. He picked it up and put it in the creek bed nearby then went on his way. Never knowing that he'd missed his chance to finally know the great secrets of crawdad existence. Sigh.