The Caterpillar came through the door in a tizzy yesterday.  I asked what was wrong.

"I did NOT get 100% on my test today. And it's not fair! And I was right! And My Teacher was wrong."

Oh, here it comes.

I have often dreaded the curse that was placed upon me by my own mother years ago.  "Someday I hope you have kids Just. Like. You." is what I can still hear ringing in my twelve year old ears, though I'm not certain that this is what she was referring to when she said it.  When The Dormouse was born, I figured she was the physical manifestation of that anathema, but weirdly, The Caterpillar has proved that prophecy more than The Dormouse ever did.

"Well how many questions did you get wrong?"



"OK. Well, what did you get wrong?"

She indignantly threw her limbs around as she opened her backpack and whipped out a paper, then presented it to me, two inches from my nose, with no chance of my eyes focusing on any of it. When I was able to wrestle it from her determined, trembling hand, I saw this:

She was supposed to have drawn a picture of what each animal eats.  Under squirrel, she drew a nut.  Under horse, she drew hay, etc.  I don't know what that tadpole-looking thing under the snake is, but my guess it's probably a mouse or something because she didn't get that marked incorrect.

Under shark, she drew a little girl.

I stifled my laughter and said, "Well, honey, I think they just wanted you to draw what the main source of food is for each animal.  Sharks don't normally eat little girls in the wild.  It's actually pretty unusual for a shark to eat a person.  Mostly, they eat smaller fish and other animals that already live in the ocean."

"Oh. I thought that was all that sharks eat."

"Where'd you get the idea that sharks eat only people?"

"I dunno. Television?"

Perhaps my glee at the possibility of a Sharknado 2 coming out was a little too infectious.